Saying our goodbye's to summer

Because it's the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL! The girls weren't too keen on the thought until Sneak - a - Peek, and then they both got EXCITED!

We got prepared by cleaning out closets and drawers, and of course I cannot forget back to school shopping which is my favorite part! Probably their's too, because who likes cleaning to get ready for school? At least I reward for good works!

After an entire summer with close to no schedule - I pulled it off in a day! I got them up early, wore them out and they were fed, bathed, and in the bed by 8:30. That is immensely better than last year and they both woke up like little jack in the boxes and started their day. We will DEFINITELY be keeping bed time this year!

I took them to school and practically had to CHASE Skylar to her classroom because she was so excited. It kind of makes me sad to have them gone but I am really happy she took going back to school so well. Nothing hurts a mama's heart more than her baby crying because they want you!

All in all, I think things will be just fine! I have a little empty nest syndrome as of now, but I know me and baby man will get used to it and might even have some fun along the way! We are hoping for a happy, successful, busy year full of learning and friendships!

Busy Gals!

Tsk tsk on moi. A brand  new blog and I can't even keep up with it! In all fairness this summer has been busy! I am not complaining because I know without a shadow of a doubt my kids have had an amazing fun-filled summer they won't forget. With the exception of Joey, unless he turns out to be some super human memory master baby...which I am highly doubtful of - but anything is possible, right?!

Here are some highlights

• Many, many, many pool days. - Girls love it, I love it, baby man not so much. He enjoys flying all around the edge of the pool and giving mommy heart attacks. We got our tans on anyway!

• 2 vacation Bible Schools - and the best part of that is MARILYN GOT SAVED! I am so happy for her and she is so dedicated to reading her Bible it just fills me with joy.

• Fun arts and crafts with the girls - in addition to some organization and PURGING of old things taking up space. I love goodwilling it and my girls do to. When I say do you think you can find some toys to give to kids who don't have any - they always shock me with their generosity. Love their little faces!

• Cheerleading camp - it was hot, it was muggy, it was buggy, but Skylar LOVED it. And she gets to cheer with one of her best friends. ...Oh, and somehow I got swindled into becoming team mom. I blame it on my dear friends who have done it before and decided it is for the newbie. Thanks guys, if I have any problems I know who to come after!

• Quality time with our family - Many dinners together..I found alot of new recipes we tried out and loved. McKenzie(Aunt Mac) has been spoiling them rotten and I love having her around. Kirsten moved back to Georgia and we are so glad to have her back...our family isn't the same without her! Spent some time with my grandparents, they just love seeing the kids, and I just love seeing them. WIN WIN!

• Playdates, playgrounds, sleepovers, and a new next door neighbor to get to know - same age!

• And MOST fun of all was our vacation to Panama City Beach! My Uncle hooked us up with an amazing deal at a the beautiful Grand Panama Resort. I got to visit with my aunt and uncle, spend lots of time with my dad and the kids, shop shop shop til I dropped(not really I could've kept going but the card wouldn't have kept up with me!), and best of all my sisters were down at the same time. It was awesome to have them there, the kids got to play with Ben, I got to visit with Lisa and Aunt Tammy, and I had my BEST friends with me - it was amazing.

Only one week left of summer! For once I got school shopping done early - no fighting crowds and depleted aisles for me! What to do to keep us busy from now until next week...

My KyKy

This was my girl 5 years ago.

Skylar is officially a 1st grader. Can I please reiterate that... A STINKIN FIRST GRADER!

My girl is a full blown kid. She's been a full blown kid for awhile now but I am in complete denial. This little girl can almost read an entire book and rarely needs help sounding anything out. Her teacher was great and I am so sad to leave her...but we're hoping for the best next year!

She has gained such a sense of independence and her personality is coming out more everyday. She can just talk and talk and busts out with some pretty funny one liners! She is definitely her mama's daughter and I cannot believe how much she looks like my mom.

While I'm reveling in her development I want to take the time to remember my baby girl as a TRUE baby girl. What prompted this entire post was not her advancement into first grade, but simply her advancement as a child who is growing up before my eyes.

Just last year she still called her swim suit a "bay bay suit", and today without warning(which mommies sometimes need but don't often get) her pronunciation was on point. Bathing suit. Tear...seriously....

Milk is no longer 'nilk' and don't ask me when that happened, it just did. I corrected and corrected for years and someday it worked.

She no longer says purple and paper like a little french speaking child. She no longer delights in pointing  out to mommy the little flying creatures in the sky and saying 'burr?' for bird. She doesn't even remember her 'money bunny' or when her uncle taught at a year old to say "Show me the money!"

She is still such a sweet girl and reminds me of all the wonderful parts of my mom. I have a tendency to harp on the negative aspects of my mother, but she truly contributed such a spunky sweetness to my little girl that she hasn't ever seemed to lose. I hope she never does.

For now, I will soak up the hugs and "I want you's." Her desire to help me every way she can and her love of washing the dishes. The stick figures and JUST quite in the line drawings that say I love you mom. Her enthusiasm and exuberance and sassy disposition. She is just the slightest bit bossy but mostly just wants to love and be loved by everyone.

I have a couple little babyisms I can still treasure that will probably be kaput by next year.
Lemonade=Lemonlade
Heavy=Havy
and my absolute favoritist(give me a break I'm talking babyism's here)
Fabulous=Fablious.

To my BIG little girl your mommy treasures you so much. Watching you grow is such a blessing...bittersweet or not. I'm sure in 5 years I will be looking back at this post feeling the same as I do right now. A mother's love never subsides and neither will the memories.

Mother's Day THIS YEAR!

I have never been a fan of mother's day. Actually, never might be a strong word. For the last several years I have not been a fan of mother's day. There are several reasons for this

• My mom is gone and I am still harboring many painful memories that seem to outshine the good times. On a day like Mother's Day, honoring her and her memory seems impossible to me. Which transforms into major guilt. Yeah...major yuckiness. Blah!
• Ever since I have become a mother I've never had anybody try to make it special for me. On my very 1st Mother's Day I was completely forgotten by Skylar's dad "because I wasn't his mom" and it took tears to my parents at 11pm and a confrontation between he and my mom for him to care. I won't dwell on that because it is in the past and he is out of our lives, but let's just say that problem has rang true in the years since.
• Because I've either been single or around people who don't seem to care it just turns into another day that I am doing it all. Hear me out here ladies...a break from the kids is sometimes very welcomed!

I wasn't expecting much else to change this year. I guess I had forgotten I have changed.

This year it didn't hurt so bad. I remembered her but I didn't let it get me down. I was very busy and didn't have much of a moment to dwell, but I like to think I wouldn't have anyway. She is loved and missed terribly and I'm going to stop feeling guilty when it isn't destroying me - it's not supposed to!

This year I reveled in the fact I am a mom. I am SO blessed beyond belief with my children. They are a constant source of joy and pride in my life and my BEST accomplishment. Getting to see them grow as people and develop their very own unique personality is a gift every. single. day. 

This year I got to celebrate with an entirely new set of people in my life. Freedom Church! I am proud to call this church my home now and I am even more proud to partner with them. Since my babies were created by God himself there was no better way to spend Mother's Day but honoring Him and the blessings He has given me. We even got a performance by all the FreedomKidz that was too cute for words! The purse was nice too!

This year I spent the most of my day with my family. After church the kids took a little a nap and I did a little work. Then we went to my grandparents with my dad. I was elated to be spending my Mother's Day with my mom's mother and the sweetest grandmother in the whole world! I was even more surprised to find my aunts and uncle Warren there as well. The next best thing to spending my day with my mom is spending it with her family. My family. They are wonderful and supportive in everything I do - I wish I saw them more often!

This year my daddy got me exactly what I wanted - he might have had some help from a little birdie named ME! But nonetheless he came through and I can't wait to go to Sips n Strokes and get my paint on!

This year my biggest surprise was the gift from Joey! He had to work that morning and afternoon and didn't get off in time to make it out with us anywhere. I had been going non stop all weekend and still had quite a full plate(still do...here's my procrastination at it's finest!). I was exhausted and couldn't wait to get home. As soon as I walked in the door much to my surprise I walked into a ridiculously clean house. I'm talking spotless and organized and all at the hands of my man...and thank goodness b/c I had no time to devote to doing it and no patience for living in it. <3'd it!

So all in all, this year's Mother's Day was great. I know without a doubt I am loved and cherished...most importantly by my kids! It is a great feeling knowing you are the one their world moves around. Those bright eyes, huge grins, sweet kisses, and wet tears - they are all for me. Everyday I get to be a leader, encourager, teacher, chef, chauffeur, healer, dream catcher, soother, playmate, and MOMMY!

...and THAT is the reason I love Mother's Day this year!

The Mommy Meltdown

We had a little scare around here last night...well I guess I should say I had a little scare. Joey was the epitome of cool, calm, and collected. Thank God because I was having a MAJOR MELTDOWN. I am a mother so I feel that I am more prone to flipping out, and my gosh after birthing this 9 pounder I believe that's my right. It is quite customary for me to be brought to tears when my children are sick because I love them dearly and hate to see them suffer. However, last night was much more intense than usual!


It may be because I just recently read and watched 'Memory Keeper's Daughter' which was a great read and also a fuel to my fire of borderline hypochondriac-ness.  Possibly because of this blog http://www.natalienortonphoto.com/  which I came across a couple of months ago. I still follow it because she is THAT inspiring, talented, and just has a way of saying things. She has also suffered a tremendous tragedy and handles it with so much grace it has at times brought me to tears. It may be because reading her family's story is what prompted me to choose the topic of vaccinations for my research paper. That research has cemented in my the dire importance of vaccinations - and also educated me on more illnesses and ramifications than I care to know about. But mostly, I have a PARALYZING fear of losing another loved one. My mother was one thing, but my children are on that I can't handle it level. And I couldn't.

He woke up screaming at 1am, which isn't unheard of he usually just wants his paci. As soon as I picked him up I knew something was wrong. He was completely limp, like a dead fish. Disoriented and on fire. Joey called in the recruits and wrangled up the baby gear while I just held my baby and sobbed. Of course I had no fever reducers thanks to the wonderful likes of  McNeil products recalling motrin and tylenol. I cannot tell you all the thoughts that ran through my head. He was FINE and showed no symptoms of infection. I prayed and sobbed and sniffled until we were at the hospital.

He HATED the hospital. The bracelet was the first thing that set him off, and continued to set him off throughout our stay. Temperature and blood pressure checks were no piece of cake either. Don't even get me started on the doctor trying to look into all those little holes of infection. The only thing this kid was happy about was the popsicle he was given by the nurses(I'm sure to shutup the symphonic levels of volume my child can hit)

After MUCH screaming and tears(from him and I) it was a freaking ear infection. I bawled. I literally said THANK GOD it's in an ear infection and then collapsed into sobs of anxiety releasing joy. Joey kept telling him, "Mommy is only being crazy because she loves you that much." I couldn't have said it better.